Youth camp
Wednesday, 22 December 2010 4:59 pm
Yesterday Pastor Jeremy came and we did a holy spirit baptism,
Shalyn and Thea came to me and call the holy spirit to come upon me,
but I didn't feel anything, I did not speak in tongues,
when I heard shiying crying and speaking in tongues,
I cried, I cried because I did not get baptised,
so i was thinking, was it because I did not trust him fully,
or what, my tears ran down like tapwater.
When the baptism thing was about to over,
thea hugged me, I feel blessed but failed at the point of time,
when thea hugged me, i guess she know why i cried,
i cried, but this make me trust in god more.
I fear of not trusting in god,
i fear of not knowing god,
i fear of not feeling god,
practically my situation is same as Darren's situation.
I don't know who to say this to,
i do not have Christians friends surrounding me,
so i guess no one could ever understand this.
Frankly speaking,
i sometimes feel like an atheist,
i don't know why i don't feel god's presence,
i don't know why my heart is so shut that god can't pry open,
but i want to know god again,
i want the old passion back.
Though i've been praying for days,
i do not know whether god will answer to it or speak to me,
but i always feels that god had give up on me,
he gave up on me because i didn't trust him enough.
Though i know his love is everlasting,
but i just can't feel his love.
I don't know why!
U-turn
Tuesday, 7 December 2010 12:34 pm
In life, we can't u-turn or undo the things we had done,
we can only continue our route all the way till the end,
there is no undo button for life,
the only one who can make or smooth our life is GOD,
he is the only one who can smoothen your life after you had done something wrong,
i am still searching for my "LION"
and i am going to fight it. :)
END!!!
Thinking
Thursday, 2 December 2010 12:17 am
Know what sculpture this is?
It's THE THINKER,
anyone who love art will know whose artwork is,
it's from Rodin,
it is made up of marble and bronze.
It depicts a man in a sober meditation battling with a powerful struggle.
I get to know this wonderful sculpture during my art SOVA,
though it's boring, but i get to see many artworks i do not know at all,
those artworks are really awesome.
I regret taking art for my o's, because it is kinda waste of time,
but now, i miss art,
i miss drawing, practically i miss everything about art,
i miss the times i spent with my best friend during art lesson.
Practically, i miss everything even school,
i miss xiaolong.
When he called me, and the first word that came out from his mouth was,
"because i miss you", though i know it's not true,
but i miss the times i like him,
and the times i miss him, but it's all over,
hopefully i won't like him for the second time
okay, more artwork to allow you all to view! :)
The gates of hell (Rodin)
My father and the astronaut (Ibrahim Hussein)
More photos tomorrow!~ :)
